KZBlog

Another ridiculous but amusing video about Kazakhstan being the center of the Masonic/Illuminati/Biblical conspiracy to take over the world as predicted in Revelations by uniting all religions and by building evil sun-worshipping pyramids and circular things. Damn those satanic triangles and circles.

If I wanted to start nitpicking this, I would note that there are lots and lots of triangles and circles in architecture and culture all over the world from all times. We can’t all be Masonic Satanist alien-colluding Zionists can we?

I would also note that my house in the US, like many houses in the US or the West even and much like the Pyramid of Peace (can I put scare quotes around scare quotes to show that I think the original scare quotes are stupid?) as described here, has a cavernous entrance in darkness. We call it the garage. Then as you rise to the second floor, you find rooms designed with lots of windows to let a lot of sun it. This is where my people gather usually. True mark of an Illuminati, liking the sun. Only normal people like to hang out in the dark and like tiny confining rooms. Cavernous=Satan. And when I look at the top of my house, there’s a peaked roof. Almost looks like a pyramid!

Finally, Astana means “capital” in Kazakh. Do you really think that 2000 years ago, the ancient Kazakh nomads were busy forming cabals with the Illuminati? Using a play on an Aramaic word (satan) and planning that in 2000 years they would make a capital in a country that didn’t even exist, named after satan, but with the letters a bit mixed up? Perhaps those who want to rename the capital Nursultan are working for the forces of good and light (wait light comes from the sun and is therefore evil, so working for the forces of good and not light) trying to undo the Illuminati curse on the city?

Finally, I would say to my dear Kazakhstany readers, watch this video and see how it makes you feel. Then before you ask a foreigner if it is true that X mass conspiracy is really true in the US and Obama is really in league with the Jews or whatever other secret socity, remember how this video makes you feel. This is how we Americans feel when you ask us about conspiracies in the US too.